I know all you mom’s know what I’m talking about. The ‘disease’ we seem to succumb to as soon was we find out we are pregnant. We begin to forget EVERYTHING! I once went to church with conditioner on my hair, not the leave in kind, because I forgot to rinse it out. I have my third child to blame that on. The thing is, there’s another type of ‘Mommy Brain’ we get. We soon get set in mommy mode and never leave. Not for anyone. Even when we are “spending time with our hubbies” we are still thinking about the kids, did I hear them?, did they just run through the house? Our hubbies deserve better.
I’ve noticed little things in my behavior that signal that I’m stuck in mommy brain.
- I make sure the kids’ clothes are washed, but forget to do my hubby’s because I was buried in laundry and didn’t want to do one more load. (Yes, he does help with the laundry, but I’m home all day, and I can put a load in and then move it, doesn’t take much time out of my day)
- When it’s dinner time I make sure the kids have something to drink, but overlook what Gerad might want.
I know none of these things are life altering, but they do show Gerad that I care about him and his needs if I put him before the kids. When I’m in mommy brain, Gerad’s needs are no where near the top of my list he comes in 4th or 5th depending on my level of selfishness. I don’t want Corbynn learning that a mommy’s job is to only be a mommy. My job is to be a wife to Gerad and then a mommy to the kids God has blessed me with. I want to leave that as a legacy to my kids. I can care for my kids very effectively while in wife mode, I just keep my priorities in check. Gerad comes before the kids.
I’ve been stuck in Mommy and teacher mode a lot lately. We’re getting ready to start our first year of homeschooling and it has been on the front of my mind, for a couple of weeks now, which is why I’ve been so absent here. I realized I write out of where I am in marriage and the last few weeks I haven’t been thinking about or working on my marriage very much. I’ve realigned my “mommy brain” and am working on keeping a balance between the kids’ needs and Gerad’s.
If any of you have any ideas on how to keep ‘Mommy Brain’ at a distance when you need to be in ‘Wife Mode’ please leave a comment, I could sure use some ideas!
P.S. I’m going to have a guest post tomorrow from Mission:Husband, you don’t want to miss it!
mission:wife 
Yay for starting your first year of homeschooling! We are starting our 14th :) but this year will be different, God has worked wonders in our marriage this last year and I’m excited and a bit anxious on how this year will be different. Homeschooling does cause “mommy brain” and it has to be watched closely, great post!
Thanks for your comment. I’ll be praying for your school year.
Mommy mode. Sometimes that tiny whine or whimper is way louder than my husband’s voice. Good reminder! Our guys are so important…not to mention awesome! Blessed we are! :)
Every morning I try to start my day by doing one thing for my love (make coffee, his lunch, or breakfast) . It helps me make sure to serve him too. :)
When I first started reading this, I thought you were announcing you were pregnant! :)
Gosh, I have no suggestions. Just know that you are not alone. I think it was this third kid that sent me over the edge because I feel like I was in “wife mode” a lot more with just two kids. Sometimes it helps me to make sure to leave time to take a shower, put on makeup and a decent outfit (you know, like, not my yoga pants). I know the kids don’t care if I wear yoga pants all day, so when I get dressed, it means I have someone else in mind.
Lol! Nope, no baby for now … I agree that the third baby takes a lot more mommy mode. I’m working on getting a routine for school and house stuff so I can spend more time in wife mode.