I was recently watching the live streaming messages from the conference True Woman ’12, hosted by Nancy Leigh Demoss. It was an amazing conference, I’m going to touch on some points Nancy Leigh made and make them applicable to our marriages. If you’d like to hear the message, it’s here.
While listening to her message I figured out the ‘secret’ to marriage. It’s so simple and yet so easy to push off its importance. The key to marriage is to seek Him. So often we forget that, we expect our husband to help solve all of our problems, we think he is the one who can fix everything and fill the longing in our heart. Truth is, he can’t. We put so much emphasis on pursuing our spouse, having fun together, and communication and when we do XYZ we think its all going to fall into place. The thing is the only thing that can make my marriage better, is me pursuing a deeper and better relationship with God. The same goes for you. Even if your spouse is not a believer, becoming more like Jesus and pursuing a relationship with Him is going to give you the strength and grace you need to be Jesus to them. (One Flesh Marriage has a great post on ‘being a salty spouse,’ its worth the read even if you spouse is a Christian.)
Your marriage is very important to God, but He designed your relationship with Him to be first. Now, I hear you saying, ‘ but I’m a Christian I love God with all my heart, I lead a Bible Study with ladies from my church and I am always serving at our church.’ Here’s the thing, serving is NOT seeking!
In Song Of Solomon 3 she loses her lover and yearns for him (NLT). We’ve all been there, yearning for our lover, we sometimes forget though what its like to yearn for Christ. If we take the time to seek and yearn for Christ and build our relationship with Him, He will mold us into the wife that He created us to be. Not only can he help me with all of the problems and concerns I have, He will never let me down. He can show me how to be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger (James 1:19). Oh, how I need to learn that lesson, and all it takes is drawing close to Him, building a relationship with Him, and putting Him first and our husbands second, just like He created it to be.
My heart says of you, “Seek his face!”
Your face, Lord, I will seek.